CKN Encounter With Randy Duo At Abuja Anglican Church

CKN

My idea of Church news and reporting does not extend to Anglican and Roman Catholic Churches. To me, these two have established doctrines different from the new generation KILL and GO Churches where money have become the root of all evil.
You can hardly see any Roman Catholic Church or that of Anglican preaching and soliciting for mouth watering donatio...ns.. Infact, i have not seen any Catholic or Anglican priest riding limousines, state of the art cars or even owning Private Jets which has become a symbol of affluence among the current Pentecostal Pastors.
Attending an Anglican and Roman Catholic Church (not minding the heresy of Kris Okotie) who said all Catholics will go to hell, even when he is not even sure of his own salvation, with all the atrocities he is performing at Household of God as a Pastor, to me is a no go area as there will be nothing of interest to report.
But the Journalistic instinct in me asked me to visit a Catholic or Anglican Church today.
Why should i ,i continue to ask myself, all the beautiful babes attend Christ Embassy, Household of God, Winners, Redeemed Christian Church of God, House on the Rock or any of those hi-tech Churches were pastors hang microphones on their ears instead of holding hand held microphones.
You can hardly see Roman Catholic Church or Anglican Church members taking Ipad or tablets to Church as a substitute for Bible as is the norm in those point and kill Churches.
Roman Catholic and Anglican Church members hardly wear open chest blouses. They don’t wear those eyes revealing see through dresses, neither do they wear miniskirts that reveals all its contents once you bend down for prayers.
Today i decided to attend a Church where i will hear no evil, see no evil.
My choice was an Anglican Church,(St Matthew Anglican Church,1st Avenue,Gwaranpa Estate,Abuja).
The Church is which located very close to the Gwarinpa market is sandwiched by five other Churches.
At the entrance were plain cloth and uniformed military men (Army,Police and Civil Defence).
Two members with bomb detectors searching all comers were stationed at the entrance.
The Church conducts two services (7am and 10am).
I decide to go for the 7am service.
The service was already in progress when i made my entry..Everyone was minding their business.
There was no unnecessary distraction (babes) unlike the Household of God and Coza that i visited sometime ago.The babes were well dressed.
The ushers unlike Household and Coza were elderly women and some young men.
I scanned around to look for a beautiful babe to join in worship, i couldn’t see any. Haba,which kain Church be this sef,i silently said to myself.
This to me was not a good hunting ground. I should have gone to Family Worship Centre at Wuye,Abuja where a fine babe invited me to attend.
Well,i don come inside already,i told myself,let me make better use of an already bad situation.
I noticed a young lady in her 20s and a guy of almost same age chatting away instead of concentrating on what the man of God was saying, i felt this must be a good one, hence i decided to squeeze myself next to them.
Just as i had my seat, it was time for sermon, one Rev Isaiah Oluwamuyiwa (i hope i got his name right), walked up to the pulpit to deliver his sermon.
I was impressed, in Anglican Church, The lord is your shepherd and you therefore need no bouncers like Okotie and others to keep watch over you.
His sermon was straight to the point..He spoke on the act of giving willingly. According to him,offerings should come from the heart and not forced. He also said, the act of blessing does not depend on how much you give but the heart with which you give. He gave example from the Bible about the Widow’s mite and how Jesus told his disciples that the woman gave the highest offering even when all she gave were peanuts.
Preach on My Pastor i echoed, how i wish all those Pastors and GOs in Lagos who ask their congregation to sow seeds with their only car, home appliances, houses, last blood etc are hearing this.
While i was enjoying the flow , it seems the devil had a different plan entirely because the young man and lady sitting beside me were not making things easy for me.
They won’t just stop chatting and laughing over things i did not understand. They were all over each other as if they have just come out of a Covent and needed to have sex even on the street.
Lo and behold, the girl was squeezing the guy’s thigh right there in the Church. She was falling all over him every other minute.
It was getting embarrassing, i wanted to ask them to please keep quiet so that i can enjoy the words of God but who sai.
They almost started kissing in the Church ,they didn’t give a damn ,not minding those of us sitting beside them.
When i couldn’t stand the madness any longer,i brought out my camera phone and started snapping away.
The idea was to capture their picture without necessary arousing their curiosity .How i wished they knew the man sitting next to them. My phone was not cooperating as if it was hearing an inner voice that it shouldn’t take the pictures. The thing just dey hang like NEPA current
I managed one or two shots but they were not good enough ..It was at this point that the lady turned to me saying “i thought it was only ladies that like snapping pictures ”,i said No, What a woman can do,i man can do even better,i like taking pictures, especially of people like you”..She smiled away, the mumu babe no sabi say na set up i dey do am..She was carried away by the compliments rather than the embarrassment i would have put her through, if i had a clear shot of her.
They continued on their voyage,right there inside the Church. Chai,this can’t be the same Anglican Church i am used to .
What is happening?..What has becomeof my good old Anglican Church .
As if she was reading my mind, the lady ,who obviously is about 26 years, decided to go for the kill when everyone closed their eyes for prayer,she went for a squeeze on the guy’s bumbum,i immediately opened my eyes, because i knew what she was aiming at. The guy was embarrassed when he noticed my glances. But the babe no send.
My mind just went straight to one of the news item ,i published today with the heading..PROSTITUTION ON THE DECLINE IN ABUJA...Maybe they have decided to shift their trade from Zone 4 Wuse to Churches
This time around, i couldn’t hold myself any longer,i asked them to respect themselves even if they are not ready to respect God.
That statement seemed to bring them back to reality.
They were still giggling, but the squeezing stopped. By then i have lost almost half of what i came to listen to.
The final straw that break the Carmel’s back came when the priest made an alter call, for Holy Communion. Could you believe that these two people were among the first set of people to walk to the altar to take Holy Communion.
It was then i knew that this God we serve is truly a merciful God. Left to me as a human ,i will strike them straight at that alter. What an effrontery .How dares them, i asked myself. Who are they deceiving?
Holy communion for (ni ile Olorun)..Baba God go surely judge things on the last day.
I almost walked up to the Priest to ask him not to allow them partake in Holy Communion, but wetin be my own sef.
I left service more depressed than i entered.
I thought i would have had an incident free service today but you can imagine how two randy people (who obviously were not married) spoilt my day.
They left the Church holding hands..Obviously going for a short time somewhere.
I have marked them down; i will visit that Church again and will look out for them. I just hope, we won’t have a repeat of what happened today else i will break the apostolic creed that we were made to render at the Anglican Church in Gwarinpa Abuja today.
But Anglican Church has not really changed o.Dem still dey very stingy. Can you imagine they did not offer those of us attending the Church for the first time simple COKE and Biscuit.That won’t happen at any of those Pentecostal Churches.
Every Church get dem own good and bad side after all.Abi lie?