The
name self sounds like one of those “short time” joints. .I mean, how will
someone name his Church COZA?..COZA, if doubled, sounds coza coza (sharp
sharp).
But
that is not the issue; COZA has been in the news of late for the wrong reasons.
Just like Kris Okotie’s Household of God’s Church, a particular Pastor in the
Federal Capital Territory Abuja is also hitting the headlines.
His
Church has become a beehive of activities, attracting all the fine babes and
upwardly mobile young men in Abuja.
Commonwealth
of Zion Assembly (What a name) is located right in the Central Area of Abuja.
It is
directly behind Nanet Suites .To be specific, the worship centre is at the
Thisday Dome, owned by Media guru Nduka Obiagbena of Thisday Newspaper.
Recently
the General overseer of the Church was involved a sexual scandal involving him
and one of his “lovely sister” sorry i mean Church member.
The
lady went on all cylinders to portray the “man of God” as a randy man who goes
after anything on skirt. Infact she said, the Pastor has tasted the “ozone
layer” of practically all the babes in the Church.
Pastor
Biodun as he is referred to is a smooth lovely young man in his 40s.His uniqueness
and American style mode of worship is attracting the young and mighty in Abuja
like ants after sugar.
Recently,
he was said to have also acquired a Rolls Royce like his counterpart at Oregun.
With
all these in mind,i made up my mind to hit COZA today for a worship of a
lifetime.
My
first disappointment on arriving Thisday Dome,COZA place of worship was that
they have no parking space.
No
vehicle was allowed about 500 meters to the gate. All vehicles were parked far
away from the Church.The road leading to the Church was barricaded by five
different vehicles.
Stationed
at the beginning of the road were some fully armed soldiers and some other
plain cloth security men.
At
the entrance to the compound proper was a bomb scanning machine (just like the
ones at the airports or banks)..You were expected to empty all metals with you
including car keys,phones and Ipads etc.
After
walking through the scanning machine, you now walk into the main hall of
Thisday Dome,where you are welcomed by some of the most beautiful babes i have
seen in Abuja.
They
were all dressed in pink or is it yellow short gowns .
They
have a smile for everyone, well chosen, spotless skin. Their smiles were
infectious just like that lady in the Maclean television commercial.
I
fancied one immediately, i clicked her an eye contact and she responded, but
there were so many distracters on ground that prevented me from going for the
kill, but i marked her down, i will be back i told myself.
I
wanted her to usher me inside the Church by herself but one overzealous one
that didn’t catch my fancy jumped in my front ,wanting to shake my hands, but i
ignored her and moved on.
The
Church was already in full session when i arrived,it was testimony time.I met
the last testimony by a lady who spoke about how she was healed after several
months of illness.
As it
is customary with me,within a second,i have scanned the entire seat and made
for one empty one beside one beautiful dame,the usher wanted to move me
somewhere else and i refused.
The
lady naturally beckon for me to join her..Smart babe i said to myself
again..Haa,these COZA babes sabi catch man jare .I gave her a long smile which
see replied with one of the best set of teeth i have ever seen in a long time.
Babes
dey Coza abeg, with these type of ladies, why won’t Pastor Biodun fall a
victim. Their looks can seduce any holy creature.
They
were beautiful, smart, friendly, open handed, receptive and ready to
compromise.
I
settled down quickly and joined the flow of songs and clapping.
As we
sat down,i saw the lady who i now realized was wearing a very very short mini
skirt,trying to use a white handkerchief to cover her open laps which she
noticed i was glaring at continuously .
She
must have noticed that my gaze which could penetrate a fully clothed body.
When
she couldn’t stand it any longer, she politely asked me why i was gazing at her
laps,i told her ,there was no need covering such a lovely body with
handkerchief, moreso since she has decided to come to Church half covered,
what’s the essence of covering them.
She
smiled and told that what’s in vogue,that i am a bush man...Whaooo, envogue,i
asked her?..Does Pastor Biodun support these type of dressing i asked her, she
said Pastor Biodun has nothing against any mode of dressing once you are
comfortable with it.
I
asked her if she was comfortable with what she was wearing and she said yes i
then went for the kill, remove your handkerchief then and lets enjoy God’s
creation. She didn’t know what to say.
She
asked me if i was a first timer to the Church and i said YES..Her smile
broadens again and she let go the cover cloth.
COZA
is a very beautiful Church. The choir made of both young men and women was
awesome. They sang like kenery, the stage was well lightened. The hall was full
to capacity with an overflow.
I was
looking out for the controversial Pastor but he was nowhere to be found..The
Church is on a 12 days prayer and fasting.
All
the female workers in the Church were well selected, a true reflection of what
the lady that accused the Pastor of Sexual harassment once stated.
Their
skirts were short but not too revealing.
At a
point ,i was now asking myself why these modern day Pastors takes so much
delight in going for young female Church members .How come Pastors Kris Okotie
and Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo find these damsels very attractive that they easily
forget the words of God.
How
come they take so much delight in having canal knowledge of the daughters of
eve even if it means ruining their callings.
COZA
is not the best of place to be , because the temptation is just too much.
It
seems all the beautiful babes in Abuja converged in that place to seek for
things i don’t know.
When
it was time for Sermon, a young mounted the stage, my disappointment was now
complete, its obvious today is not going to be my day.
He
went on to announce that the Senior Pastor was not around for service today but
that he will be back in the days ahead.
He
went ahead to preach on prosperity and joy of given.
According
to him, Ecclesiates Chapter 10:19 stated that “Money Answereth Everything”,that
with money you can get all the good things of life including cars,women etc..No
wonder his Senior Pastor is in the news for the wrong reasons i muted.
He
went on “this year all those of you that are looking for the fruits of the womb
will become pregnant..All those who were into relationship last year will get
married this year. All those that were disappointed in business will smile this
year. blablabla.
The
preaching was the same. The audience was the difference.
I was
told Pastor Biodun is a powerful dresser..He loves cars and women to piece. He
is also very generous .According to the lady that sat beside me,there is no way
you will meet Pastor without melting and “falling for him” even if he doesn’t
toast you. The guy fine die, she stated.
After service, i left quickly to look for that
babe at the entrance.
She
was waiting for me already,i told her as a new convert to the Church, i will
need more personal home preaching to convince me to continue coming to Church.
She
was more than happy to oblige me. We exchanged number,to meet at our Chicken
Nkwobi joint later this evening
I
look forward to that wonderful home bible study.I want to learn a thing or two
or even try those stunts that Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo is noted for with his
female Church members
Who
knows, i may be in for a good time in the presence of the Lord via COZA in the
days and weeks ahead.
But I
will not rest until i meet Pastor Biodun one on one. Till then ,i rest my case
.CKN
So, your reasons for going from church to church these days is to confirm your suspicions about things heard and not to worship God, huh? Itsorait.
ReplyDeleteThis CKN has issues o! So, you remove comments you don't like?
ReplyDeleteThis CKN has issues o! So, you remove comments you don't like?
ReplyDeleteIs dat accusation true?CKN
ReplyDeleteLet GOD be truth, and all men be liars!
ReplyDeleteHE is never deceived or mocked.
Salvation is personal.
Hahahahaha! Reading dis piece got me laffing really hard.
ReplyDeleteCkn after this I will uninstall your app on my phone... I advise you remove this post it only pot rays the extent of your stupidity.
ReplyDelete